Why You Should Be Naive When Making Your College Decision
“Gracie, you’re so brave! I don’t know how you do it,” my Aunt told me one day over lunch. The sweetness and well-intent of my best Aunt (like a best friend) can not be looked over, but this word, “brave,” still vibrates on the tip of my tongue, as I try to figure out where to place it in my mind. It feels dominating, like a treasure that has just been placed inside of us and we’re expected to use when we really need it. No, but really, where does it come from? Here’s my story:
I would like to say that I’m addicted to adventure but scared of it at the same time. I’m the type of person who will talk endlessly about my dreams and aspirations, convince myself to go on a safer or easier path, and then, in just the nick-of-time, I decide, “No. I’m going with my dream.”
When I was just thirteen, I dreamed of nothing else but living in California one day. Maybe it was all the Disney Channel and Nickelodeon I had been watching, but the idea of traveling across the country to live so vastly different was a game-changer. I put together a plan in my head and figured that my best bets were to go to college there. I dreamt of my life there, the interactions I would have with people, the feelings I would experience. In my mind, it was nothing short of amazing. The time came to apply to colleges my senior year. I got accepted to two schools in Los Angeles. I was ecstatic. But the voice that asked me “what would happen if I diverged from the path that led most of my graduating class to attend northeastern Ivies and liberal arts schools” screamed louder and louder. What would happen if I flew 6 hours to the West Coast instead of driving 3 across two states? What would happen if I lived in a different time zone from my friends and family? What would happen if I moved to a place where no one in my family had ever lived or regularly traveled to? What would happen if I deviated from what people expected of me? Would I fail because it was out of the ordinary? Who would I turn into?
So of course, I visited the schools that fit within the demographic that people had already signed and sealed for me. I entertained, for quite some time, the idea that I would be satisfied if I played it safe. I considered whether or not my young and barely teenage brain had just been living in a fairytale land and that I was just dead wrong about everything.
I think back on this moment, because 4 years ago, on this very day, I almost let the prospect of living someone else’s dream stop me from creating and following my own.
But on May 1 2016, on the last possible day to choose, I decided that a chance to take the leap and make it across the gap showing danger, failure, or heartache, was everything to me. So I jumped.
Four years later, I have experienced far more greater things in my life than choosing to go to college 2,274 miles away from home. But, at the same time, I understand that this was my foundation to those experiences because my naïveté turned into bravery.
To be brave means that you are ready to face and endure danger or pain. Check. Just as I suspected and just as I had prepared myself to be on May 1 2016. But — by letting my teenage dreams and visions of myself lead me to a place where I needed to make a brave decision in order to be who I wanted to be, I was naïve. But this is such a good thing, I’m telling you! Because from this decision, I have lived out parts of my teenage dream in California but I also have lived out parts of stresses and nightmares that were previously unimaginable. Its important to note that before we jump in, we never know what will be inside of the rabbit hole. We can never even imagine it, see it, hear it, or smell it. The highs and the lows will hit you at every angle, because that Life and that’s what she does. But if I had silenced that naïve teenage voice telling me to go, despite all of the circumstances and consequences, I would not be the person I am now. And I love that person. By being naïve, I became brave, and I am grateful every day that I let myself take risks and make mistakes if it allows me to dream.
